Everyone has a divorce story. Whether they’ve been through one or not hardly matters – they all have advice for you. While much of it is well-meaning, there are a few fallacies that need to be cleared up:
Not all Divorce Attorneys are Cut-Throat
Some divorce attorneys are focused on keeping the family intact, even if the marriage isn’t. A collaborative divorce is one where the soon-to-be exes work together to come to an amicable agreement. It’s often quicker and less damaging than a traditional divorce. It is a good solution for couples with children.
Divorces Take Forever
The divorce doesn’t take long, it’s the arguing over custody and money that tie up most divorces. A collaborative divorce often takes less time than a traditional one because of the mediation work that is performed to come to an agreement. The quicker you can come to a resolution over dividing possessions and time with children, the faster your divorce can be granted.
My Children Will Have to Choose Where to Live
While a school district and court will request a primary residence for the children, there is no reason why (if both spouses are willing and able) that a joint custody arrangement can’t be worked out. However, know that some courts are still a little leery of this arrangement as they worry it won’t work in the long run.
If you and your ex are able to maintain open communication, maximizing time with both parents can help make things easier on the children. If communication is not possible, or there are a lot of bad feelings between you, this may not be the ideal arrangement.
My Ex Wants Shared Custody So She Doesn’t Have to Pay Child Support
The calculations done by the court on behalf of the child are based on equalizing the residences. Yes, the amount of time spent at each does factor into the equation but it is not the only thing it looks at. Even with a 50/50 arrangement, the court wants both homes to offer equal environments and so child support may still be paid in the case of disparate incomes.
No-Fault Divorce is Fast and Cheap
No-fault divorce means you don’t need to list a fault as to why the marriage is irreparably damaged. It has nothing to do with division of assets or custody, which are the time takers in divorces.
My Spouse Won’t Get Custody. He’s a Cheater.
While cheating may be frowned upon by society, it doesn’t make someone an unfit parent. Custody is about the best interest of the child not broken marriage vows.
Living Apart for a Year Makes You Legally Separated
Florida does not recognize legal separation through filing or living apart for a determined period of time. A family law and divorce attorney can advise you on how separation in Florida can be accomplished.
Divorce is a very individualized process. What worked for your friend, may not be the best fit for you. If you’re interested in finding out more about a collaborative divorce or other options, call Dean Tsourakis today at 727-785-2700 to discuss the best solution for you and your family.
on Dec 2, 2014